Dan texts Caroline. A cancellation at the office means he's ready for quality time, i.e. sex. But when he burps up his breakfast of lox and onion bagel, the morning sickness sets in. Dan suggests skipping foreplay, offending Caroline. When a pregnant wife gets sick, how about offering ginger ale or a foot rub? Dan can't help turning his foot rub into foreplay, so Caroline sends him back to the office. On his way out, Dan bumps into Junior. Junior got Dan's text - he's ready for quality time!
Dan's business partner, Rick, is living Dan's empty nest dream. Pouring salt in the wound, Rick shows Dan the photos from his first trip with his wife, who's showing off her new boob job. Across town, Miguel and Lisette are at Demetrio's elementary school for parents' night. Miguel's crack - that pretty soon they'll be attending grandparents' day - puts Lisette on edge. Her discomfort morphs to full-blown upset when she discovers Demetrio's sexy teacher, Ms. Nunez, is Miguel's ex. Miguel tries to play it off, but Lisette's face is serious as stone in the car on the way home.
Molly asks her mom if pregnancy can "disrupt the romance" in a relationship. Caroline never thought she'd bond with her daughter over the subject, but nevertheless tells Molly she should communicate with Junior if he's acting uncomfortable. Dan goes to Miguel's gym to let off some steam. He's still fuming about Rick's bragging. Dan was supposed to be doing the stuff Rick is doing but he can't because his wife and daughter are knocked up! After Miguel pisses him off even more, Dan leaves the gym and buys an RV on a whim. On her own whim, Caroline calls Dan and asks him to pick up a cheeseburger to make amends for his insensitivity. Excited about the RV, Dan arrives home without the burger, pissing Caroline off. What's next - having her get her boobs done like Rick's wife?
Ms. Nunez calls Miguel and Lisette to school. Demetrio is neglecting his "Of Mice and Men" reading assignment and claims his mom told him he didn't have to do it. Assuming Demetrio lied, Miguel promises to fix the situation, but on the way home, Lisette admits she told Demetrio not to read out of spite towards Ms. Nunez. It turns out Lisette is feeling depressed about her impending "grandma-dom." Miguel tries to cheer her up, saying she's going to be a super sexy grandma, but Lisette is not impressed. Meanwhile, Molly confronts Junior. Is he not having sex with her because she's pregnant? Junior admits he feels uncomfortable having sex because they're in her parents' house.
Seesawing between nausea and starvation, an angry Caroline calls Dan, who's back at the gym and doesn't pick up. Totally frustrated, Caroline hops in the RV intending to return it, surprising Molly and Junior who are in the vehicle trying to have sex. Caroline doesn't care. On the way to the dealership, she spies a burger joint and makes a U-turn. It's not long before Dan gets the call: Caroline got the RV stuck in the drive-thru!
At the scene, the police threaten to impound the vehicle and arrest Caroline if she doesn't cooperate. When Dan asks Miguel to distract the cops, he seizes the opportunity to boost Lisette's confidence by asking her to flirt with the cop. Lisette provides Dan with the cover he needs to talk Caroline down. In the RV, Caroline is panicking. She wanted to do all the empty nester things Dan wanted to do, and she simply can't be pregnant by herself. Finally, Dan gets it. Standing firmly by his wife, he tells the police that nothing's gonna happen until his wife gets a triple-decker with cheese!
Dan and Caroline decide to keep the RV. Since it was damaged in the drive-thru incident, they don't really have a choice. Caroline forbids Molly from ever using the RV, which of course gives Junior and Molly all the incentive they need to disobey her. Dan's alarmed when he sees the RV rocking, but Caroline calms him down. Now they have the house to themselves!
Uneasy about becoming a grandma, Lisette meets an old flame of Miguel's - Demetrio's new teacher! Eva Longoria guest stars.