I'm not sure how I got in the middle of this. I mean, Diana and I are just starting to feel our way around this dating thing. And I think Nancy is starting to feel her way around me not chasing after her anymore. Add to that, stress on the job and Nancy bumping up against the limitations of our chosen career. And Diana being where Nancy sometimes wishes she was. It was the inevitable cat fight and a no-win situation for me.
Complications upon complications.
But seriously, if these are the worst of my problems, I'm doing good. Seeing Valencia again today put a few too many things into perspective for me. Part of me doesn't understand the mentality of someone who can go from one abusive relationship to another. Or stay in the same abusive relationship, incident after incident.
But then I think about all the damaged people we deal with day in and day out and I can kinda see how low self-esteem plays into a lot of these self-destructive behaviors. Sometimes I wonder how it is that more paramedics don't end up like Valencia. It's like that old computer programmer saying--garbage in, garbage out. But in this case, it's damage in, damage out.
I hope that what happened today can shake Valencia out of where she's been. Maybe she finally feels empowered enough, so that next time, she gets out sooner or doesn't enter into it in the first place.
If you take nothing else away from this blog, just remember this. Start with you.
Pace a voi.