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Raising a Schrute
Angela's enormous monster baby reminds me of another enormous monster baby I once met: myself. If the DNA results prove Philip is my spawn, …
The diligent life of a Schrute begins as soon as the mother bites off the umbilical cord. Much like a cow walks two hours after birth, a Sch…
This is primarily due to the fact that within the Schrute family, it's tradition for the youngest child to raise the other children. I've be…
Schrute babies are born with six-packs and firm German thighs. They don't waste time "scooting" or rolling around like idiots. They're walki…
You'll never see a Schrute drooling on themselves in one of those froofy "cribs" while watching Moron the Explorer. Instead, they spend thei…
It may seem as if hours of manual labor displeases them. On the contrary! It's simply that Schrutes are taught not to smile, as showing one'…
Since Schrute children bear a great deal of responsibility but no driver's license, they're each assigned their own goat to ride in and out …
A popular rite of passage ritual is the "Dresser Dive." At Christmastime, the youth must eat an entire ham, then dive into the swimming hole…
Upon success, they're considered a man and get to keep the handmade dresser as a gift. If they fail, they're rolled in manure and then put i…
Schrutes are indefatigable, and Philip would be no exception. I can already picture him eagerly tugging at the fibrous root of a red beet, a…
The Wedding of Dwight and Angela
Where Are They Now?
Dwight and Jim Final Emails
Finale: Behind the Scenes
Livin the Dream
Andy's Diary from the Movie Set