The Marriage Ref

After 26 bliss-filled years of marriage, you'd think the Fitzpatricks would have worked through just about all of their differences. And they have, except for one nagging problem: Brian's fixation on installing a urinal inside the house. He's been searching for just the right unit for almost five years. Caren is decidedly against it.

"It's not a home improvement," she tells him firmly. "It's a home detriment. It smells."
"I will tend to the urinal," says Brian, adding "You have to stand to pee to understand how important this is."

Caren's undeterred. "Nothing that begins with 'urine' should be in the house," she tells him. He explains that he wants to put it in the downstairs bathroom—one of three bathrooms in the house.
"I don't think so," she declares. "That is the guest bathroom."

The panel's amused. "I live on the road with a bunch of guys, I know from urinals," says Sheryl. "I'm going with the husband," she says.

Jimmy's with Caren. "You can't have a urinal in your house. The wife can't use it. He's obviously peeing too much."

Kirstie doesn't understand what all the fuss is about. "I really don't think there's a difference germ-wise and gross-wise between peein' all over the carpet and the toilet and peeing in a urinal," she says. "What they should invent is a gir-inal—one that women can use. I don't see why you can't have a toilet, a bidet, and a urinal all in the same bathroom."

Tom's heard enough and summons Brian and Caren via satellite. "Brian," he tells the husband," we're seeing way too much male peeing already: on golf courses, by the side of the road, in alleyways. We don't need more. Caren, you win!"

The Fitzpatricks received a Second Honeymoon at Breezes Resort & Spa in Panama. For more information on Breezes resorts, visit www.breezes.com.

Travel journals coming soon!