The Sound of Music
Special encore presentation Saturday 8/7c. Watch the special online now.
LESLIE'S GUIDE TO WASHINGTON, D.C.
I just got back from Washington, D.C. and it was more wonderful than I ever imagined anything could ever be, ever! Washington has so many fantastic, historically important things to see. Here are a few!
The White House
Present home of President Barack Obama and future home of President Leslie Knope. I'll make it open to the public - no need to thank me now. I'll also listen to everyone's problems and work my butt off to fix them. America will be number one in parks, number one in education, and number at being number one! The economy will turn around, unemployment will drop, peace and prosperity with flourish, the space program will get off its ass and do something - okay, breathe, Leslie, it's still four to eight years away. But for now, welcome in advance for when you can visit my house!
The Oval Office may be the best room in D.C. - nay, the world - but President Lincoln here has the best view. That's one amazing chair, Mr. President. Self-reminder: have Ron build me a replica of it for the chair in my City Council office.
Library Of Congress
It's a well-known fact that libraries are the worst things in the world, but as it turns out, there's always an exception to the rule... ah, I can't do this. Who am I kidding? Pass on this. Total pass.
Thomas Jefferson Memorial
Go here at night with a slice of apple pie, a copy of the Declaration of Independence, a friend or a lover, and just marvel. "We hold these truths to be self-evident" that all memorials were created equal and magnificently awesome. Even better: put some whipped cream on that slice of pie. Wow. How about some ice cream on the side? Great. Now imagine instead of a slice of pie, it's a whole waffle. And your "friend" who's with you is a big bottle of maple syrup. Now that's what I call Washington, D.C.!
U.S. Supreme Court
Where are the best fights in the world staged? I'm glad you asked! It's not in Vegas, or New York, or even at the Olympics. They happen inside the walls of the U.S. Supreme Court building! In that ring of justice, we got such bouts as Brown v. Board, Miranda v. Arizona, and Gideon v. Wainwright. It's true what I say - the U.S. Constitution really is the heavyweight champion of the world.
The Washington Monument
Our first president gets our tallest D.C. monument! Little known fact: the difference in color on the monument signifies when construction was halted from 1854 to 1877. You probably heard it here first... but it really should be taught in every classroom! Take action, Department of Education! You're slipping!
(In Georgetown Waterfront Park)
Running through a fountain in the nation's capital is something I could, and did, only dream about until this was installed last September. If you plan to take a tour of the Interactive Fountains of the U.S. someday as I do, then this fountain is the perfect bookend. It'll really make all the other regular fountains you ever see look like crap.
Robert E. Lee's Boyhood Home
The great general never spoke much of his childhood, so this structure is one of the few things we do know about. It is a private residence, so be careful with how loudly you re-enact your dramatic war speeches. Also, do not peek into the third window on the left, unless you want to see a 45-year-old man shaving his beard over the sink and then have that man call you "Grown-Up Kirsten Dunst."
George Washington's Tomb
Located at the Mt. Vernon Estate, where the great president passed in 1799. Come prepared with a full box of tissues; don't skimp yourself on a travel pack, or you WILL run out and end up wiping away your tears with the novelty American flag towel you bought and people WILL stare and you'll never be able to look at a dollar bill without seeing George's face and remembering how embarrassed you felt and the sadness as well and... tearing up a little again.
National Postal Museum
This Smithsonian museum features engaging exhibits about sending, receiving and delivering mail. Explore the history of the postage stamp and marvel over thousands of stamps and postal artifacts. Full disclosure: I copied and pasted this from the museum's pamphlet because I honestly could not have said it any better myself. I love mail!
Theodore Roosevelt Island
This site has it all! From orchidacae to lilium, microfauna to megafauna! To be honest, not as many varieties of coniferae as I would prefer, but still... I can go on and on about natural wildlife, and I do! (See p. 70-86 for locations and descriptions of the island's best flora and fauna.)
Lincoln's Waffle Shop (504 10Th St Nw)
I did by far my most research on this, as I went through all 895,000 Google results of: "Waffles" "Washington, D.C." So, yes, I know Back Alley Waffles has the newest in waffle trends, and Wicked Waffle has the most waffle variety, but the Waffle Shop does a waffle the way it was meant to be. However, by my fifth meal here, on my second day, I realized it wasn't that the waffles at the Waffle Shop were bad - they just weren't mine. I guess it's true what I say: the home is where the waffle is. So, sorry, Waffle Shop, I'm dreaming of a different waffle. JJ, you had me at: "caccssshhhhhhhh" (that's the sound of a waffle iron, it works better in person).