Nipple Confusion

Season 5
Episode 503
Air Date 10/10/13
TV-14

An exhausted Jasmine pumps milk at the kitchen table. Wide-eyed, Crosby can't look away and seems oblivious to Jasmine's desperate plea for help getting Aida on a bottle. When the baby fusses, Crosby asks how to hook her up to the breast pump. With a sigh, Jasmine gestures for the baby and puts her to the breast. Across town, Adam and Kristina's house has been completely transformed into a chaotic campaign office that's hemorrhaging money for buttons, posters and the like. Adam comes downstairs to find no coffee but several cases of fresh kale juice just being delivered. Since campaign donations are just starting to roll in, Kristina asks Adam for his credit card so she can cover her expenses - for now.

Amber and Ryan are just getting it on when Drew walks in without knocking. His roommate Berto put his lacrosse stick on the door again, which means Drew has nowhere to sleep. He's been sexiled! Ryan turns blue as Amber offers to let Drew crash. The next day, Drew realizes the situation is untenable when he realizes he has nowhere to hang with his pretty dorm mate, Natalie. Berto has stolen his sheets, and Drew is sexiled once again. Amber and Ryan offer to help and storm down to the dorm to set Berto straight. No more locking Drew out, no more touching Drew's stuff. If Berto has a problem with Drew, he has a problem with Ryan.

Julia and Joel are called to school to speak with Miss Mikindoe, who wants to discuss the possibility of having Victor repeat the fourth grade - which would put him in the same grade as Sydney. Joel thinks it's simply a matter of spending more time reading with Victor, but Julia knows the problem isn't that simple, since she worked with Victor every day over the summer with little improvement. Agonized, Julia stays up all night thinking about the problem, but a dismissive Joel accuses her of going nuclear. Over breakfast, Joel mentions the book he and Victor read together last night. After Julia investigates, it's clear Joel did all the reading and Victor didn't retain anything.

Convinced that campaign manager Heather is going to spend all their money, Adam decides to revise Kristina's campaign budget. When Sarah offers to take Kristina's campaign headshot for free, he jumps. That night, Adam finds Kristina trying on clothes - it seems like she's going to need a whole new wardrobe! That's when Adam asks Kristina to review his revised budget. Offended and defensive, Kristina reminds him that everything they've spent out-of-pocket will be paid back. Does Adam remember how Kristina supported him when he opened The Luncheonette while she was six months pregnant!? Angry that Adam doesn't trust her to know her own business, Kristina stomps out of the bedroom.

Sarah stops by Hank's to borrow equipment for her photo shoot. Just then, Adam calls to say Kristina decided to go with a more experienced photographer. Upset that her family isn't taking her seriously, Sarah's even more offended when Hank asks why they would. The Bravermans don't take her seriously because they know her; working with family is hell. Furthermore, Sarah is flighty - she doesn't stick with careers for too long. Sarah decides to pitch herself to Kristina. Pulling out her portfolio of pet portraits, Sarah explains that she believes in Kristina 100%, and that's what will make her photos shine. The pressure's on, but in the end, Sarah's show of faith in Kristina wins her the job.

Camille's eyes nearly pop out of her head when a tow truck drops off a 1965 Pontiac GTO convertible - which Zeek maintains can only be referred to as "she." They were supposed to talk about selling the house, and this is Zeek's answer? A year-long restoration project!? Later, Crosby shows Zeek a new, more naturally nippled bottle system while explaining the difficulty he and Jasmine are having with Aida, who won't stop crying and settle down to feed. Crosby's at his wits' end. Zeek admits daughters are tough; one day they love you, the next day, who knows? Luckily, it's that mysterious female quality that makes it all good in the end.

Ed finds Julia frowning and staring out into space outside the school; clearly she's not fine. Explaining that the words she's about to say never left her mouth, Julia confesses Victor's teacher has opened the conversation about holding him back. Within moments, Ed puts Julia completely at ease, suggesting they talk through a pro/con list. Meanwhile, Max, Heather and Nora are on hand for Kristina's photo shoot and turn it into absolute mayhem. That night, Sarah stops by Hank's studio to ask his honest opinion: are her photos any good? They are.

Julia and Joel discuss Victor's situation before bed. Julia wants to rip off the bandage and have Victor repeat the fourth grade; the longer they wait the worse it will be. Joel immediately takes offense. In his mind, holding Victor back will shred his self-confidence. When Julia mentions a study Ed told her about, Joel flames out, insisting that Ed's wife will tell the whole school about Victor. What else are Julia and Ed talking about? And furthermore, why was Julia needling Victor at breakfast over the book he didn't read? Joel wants to end the conversation without resolution, but Julia presses for a plan. Joel claims they already made a plan with Victor's teacher: to take a month and see how it goes. If Julia doesn't like it, she should talk to Ed. With that, Joel leaves to take a walk.

Adam finds Kristina staring at Sarah's campaign portrait - it looks great! To Kristina it's a revelation; she's not used to seeing herself with hair. She feels like a lucky badass for kicking cancer in the teeth. Still, maybe she got ahead of herself with the campaign, so she's decided to talk to Heather about spending less money. Overcome with love for his wife, all Adam can do is reach in his wallet and give her every single credit card in it. Across town, Zeek and Camille sit in the garden to finally have a conversation about the house. For Zeek, the place is full of the memories he's worked for his whole life - they're all he's ever wanted. But Camille wants more for their third act - they could afford to do so many things if they sold the house!

Joel returns home from work to find Sydney and Julia reading with Victor. Joel joins in the reading session, but it's clear his relationship with Julia has taken a frosty turn. Meanwhile, surprised to find the house quiet at last, Jasmine peeks her head around a corner, delighted to witness the victorious moment Crosby finally gets Aida to take a bottle - and the very moment when he falls head over heels in love with his daughter.

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