Pass Interference

Season 1
Episode 115
Air Date 01/29/13
TV-PG

Lauren is leading a weight-loss support group, standing in front of a table filled with toxic trigger foods, when Ryan walks in and sits down. He immediately starts sharing his ghostly problem, but Lauren stops him - this isn't a grief group! Ryan presses on, likening Janie and Simone to cupcakes. Steaming, Lauren refuses to engage and tries to push Ryan towards the door, but he winds up munching at the toxic foods table. He continues his story, while rewarding group members for their advice - go somewhere Janie isn't - with their favorite foods. Everything's going well, until a really big dude and three of his buddies stand up, ordering Ryan to leave.

Lauren remarks romance has come to the group just in time for Valentine's Day. Last night everyone walked in on Ryan and Simone, and no one wants things to be awkward. Simone insists the people in the room are the ones she'd most like to see her making love. When Lauren reminds them there's a group rule against dating, Owen accuse her of hating love, and everyone chimes in. Ryan cuts the chatter, demanding to know why they need dating rules in the first place? Maybe last night was a one-time thing. When Simone assures him it wasn't, the chanting begins. Yolanda tries to steer the conversation back to loss, but Mr. K refuses to go back - it's too boring!

Yolanda approaches Lauren with her "How to Make a Perfect Wedding" binder - even though her groom left her at the altar. The girls have gotten Lauren an appointment at Salon Martinique to try on wedding dresses. When Lauren puts the girls off, Fausta comes up with another plan: they'll find the perfect dress on their own - using Owen as a fit model, since he has the exact same body as Lauren. Meanwhile, Lauren tells Ryan he really should obey her no dating rule. A relationship will kick up issues, and if Simone is in the group, Ryan won't be able to deal with them. Ryan promises to keep any such promises out of the group - he can just call Lauren. No, Lauren warns. She is not Ryan's personal therapist...

Anne, Fausta, Sonia and Yolanda drink champagne while Owen tries on dresses at an upscale boutique. He's having a rough time until the sexy sales associate compliments his ballsy confidence. Suddenly, Owen emerges from the dressing room in tears - they've found the perfect dress for Lauren! Across town, Simone has made dinner for Ryan, and they're having a great time. In fact, being told they're not allowed to date has made everything better... until Janie shows up to interrupt their make-out session. Rather than explain what's happening, Ryan freezes up and turns on the TV.

Lauren agrees, Owen looks great in the wedding dress, then confesses the truth. She's been putting off planning her wedding because all the details freak her out. The girls aren't happy to hear this; they were intending to live Lauren's special day vicariously, and none of them are getting married any time soon. Lauren points out the girls don't have to get married to celebrate themselves. It's not long before the girls have planned to throw themselves a Goddess Party on Valentine's Day, with no Valentine's stuff.

Anne, Fausta, Sonia and Yolanda check out a fancy restaurant as a possible venue for their Goddess Party. Yolanda has been up all night, creating a composite photo of the four of them, which shall ever be known as super bride Sofanda. The girls are nauseated. Since Yolanda picked the venue, she wants the others to take turns picking other stuff to avoid conflict. Anne wants balloons, not flowers. Sonia intends to scat in front of a jazz band, but Fausta's not having it - she wants a Latin funk band, which no one else wants.

Ryan takes Simone to a hipster hotel for an evening without Janie. He asks for a second to set the mood, shutting her out of the room. Then he kisses his hand, pretending he's amidst a romantic situation, and searches the room for any sign of Janie. Simone opens the door and catches him in the act, but Ryan claims he was simply warming up. Simone hits the shower, which is when Janie shows up with her hot ghost boyfriend Thomas. Janie and Thomas hop on the bed, grab the remote and start watching "The Avengers." Freaked out, Ryan tosses the room key towards the shower and takes off.

The next day, tension is thick during the group meeting. Finally Simone breaks the silence. Ryan won't touch her; he keeps kissing his hand, and he left her naked in the shower. When Yolanda warns that Lauren told them not to talk about the relationship, Simone corrects her. They can talk because the relationship is over. Ryan confesses: every time he tries to get romantic with Simone, Janie shows up. After claiming he's quite lucid, Mr. K explains that Ryan's seeing Janie because he doesn't want to hurt her, and he invented Thomas to punish himself. Ryan and Simone both admit Mr. K's advice helps.

After group, the goddesses start arguing, as do Ryan and Simone. Not only did everyone hire the bands of their choice, but Simone called her ex-boyfriend Marco and begged him to take her back - using the very expensive hotel phone. Within minutes, Ryan decides he can't be with Simone because she's too unstable, and the goddesses cancel their party. That night, Anne sits alone at the restaurant bar swallowing helium from one of her balloons. Looking at all the bridal regalia from her cancelled wedding, Yolanda decides to take action, calling everyone down to the restaurant.

Yolanda opens her binder to show the 51st step for the perfect wedding: If it's right, don't take no for an answer. Her wedding wasn't right, but the Goddess Party is. Luckily, Fausta couldn't cancel her favorite Latin funk band - because they have no phone! It's not long before the party is in full swing; even Janie's in attendance. Janie apologizes for the other night, but Ryan thinks everything's fine. He can't be with Simone; she's too crazy. Janie insists crazy Simone might be just the person to understand Ryan's craziness. Ryan gets on his knees and asks Simone if she'd like to be crazy with him. She would!

Lauren calls everyone together to toast the goddesses, who don't need men, rings or sanity to make them whole. Yolanda presents Lauren with the wedding binder - it's time for her to start planning her own wedding! Sonia tells Lauren to start tonight by picking a venue, then offers a surprise to help her along. Wyatt is back one day early from his business trip! From the back, Wyatt hugs Owen, mistaking him for Lauren...

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