A successful relationship is built on trust, communication, and an understanding of each others' needs. Morgan Grimes understands that communicating to Anna all of the details needed for his happiness is an essential preliminary step to moving in together. Read on-and if you've got your own demands or conditions that you'd like to see added to the list, please feel free to share.

NONMARITAL COHABITATION / LIVING
TOGETHER AGREEMENT

LIST OF PECULIARITIES

Morgan Grimes reserves the right to the following peculiarities and eccentricities for the course of the relationship or until he wishes to behave or think differently.

ACCORDION - Grimes reserves Friday from 9PM and 10PM for practice

AIR - Shall not be humidified or dehumidified. Free Air! No Oppression!

ANKLE BRACELETS - Based on a movie viewing experience as a child, Grimes distrusts those who wear ankle bracelets. Cohabitant can decide if he/she values his/her ankle bracelet over Grimes' trust.

APPLES -Under no circumstances will a Pink Lady be allowed in the residence.

BARCELONA - Shall not be brought up in conversation

BLUE-FOOTED BOOBY - All documentaries and specials that air on television concerning the blue-footed booby must be recorded and saved.

CAT (SEE PETS - AS IN THERE ARE NO PETS ALLOWED)

CHEESE - Only string cheese is allowed in residence. Except on weekends when an exception is made for Gouda.

COOKIES - In descending order of purchasing preference:

  • 1) Shortbread
  • 2) Sugar
  • 3) Peanut Butter
  • 4) Chocolate chip
  • 5) Oatmeal
  • 6) Fortune
  • 7) Walnut
  • 8) Pecan
  • 9) Oatmeal raisin
  • 10) Chocolate mint
  • 11) Peppermint
  • 12) Ginger Snaps
  • 13) Snickerdoodle
  • 14) Butter
  • 15) Fig

CRACKLE - None of your joints or digits are allowed to crackle while Grimes is in the same residence. (SEE ALSO POP)

CYMBAL-BANGING MONKEY - Grimes owns one and it cannot be touched or wound or stared at for long periods.

DOGS - (SEE PETS - AS IN THERE ARE NO PETS ALLOWED)

EMERGENCY NUMBERS - Available upon request once emergency has occurred.

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