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ANGELA'S MENTOR RULES
Despite its name, petty cash should be taken very seriously every penny must be accounted for.
Neon Post-its are loud, pastel Post-its, however, have a certain charm.
Excuses are like puppies: lots of people buy them, but not me. I hate them.
"Breaks" are for cars and elderly hips, but definitely not for someone trying to learn accounting.
Anyone who says, "accidents happen" was probably "an accident" themselves.
If I wanted to hear personal problems, I'd eavesdrop.
Dress to impress... me.
During breaks, acceptable topics for small talk include: the weather, work, cat and kitten related inquiries, silence, raw vegetables, your mistakes, our co-worker's incompetence, and babies.
No tattoos.
Only hussies and strumpets chew gum.
If you ever turn a bag of potato chips completely upside down and pour the crumbs into your open mouth, we're done.
If you are feeling sick, please quarantine yourself at home until a non catholic doctor determines it's acceptable for you to return to work.
Red should only be worn around Christmas we're not loose or Chinese people.
If God wanted us to bite our nails, he would've given us baby carrots for fingers.
Only subtle make-up, one fallen fleck of mascara could be mistaken as a decimal point.
Accounting software does not double check because it feels no shame. Shame is an accountant's best friend.
Never eat ethnic food, there are too many things that can go wrong.
Everything should be in alphabetical order. Everything.
Courier font is preferred, Times New Roman is too flashy for my taste.
Only eat enough calories to give you the energy to complete your workday, any more is gluttony.
Sanitize, sanitize, sanitize.
Always have three back up rolls of adding machine tape at your desk, just in case.
Permanent markers make permanent marks.
KEVIN'S RULES FOR MENTORING
- Always look busy especially when youre not.
- Erase your Internet history regularly.
- Careful with your necktie around the shredder.
-Ignore the negative, embrace the posative.
