The Sound of Music
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What was your first solo stand-up gig?
I performed a lunchtime gig at a college outside of Toronto. I had about fifteen solid minutes of material and the gig was meant to be an hour long.
What is your worst nightmare as a comic while performing on stage? Has it happened?
My worst nightmare while performing on stage would be to be attacked by a robot. It hasn't happened yet.
When did you realize you were funny? Why? Tell us the story.
I am not sure exactly. A little while ago, I was looking through some of my old papers and found a report prepared by a next door neighbor who was studying early childhood education and used me as a case study. I drew a number of different pictures: a horse with goggles on, a hairy ghost. I guess even at the age of three, I had weird perspective on life.
Who are your comic influences? What are your comedic influences?
I love the improvisation of Eddie Izzard. I was profoundly influenced by the absurdism of Monty Python and the parody of Second City. I love Patton Oswald for his energy and charisma and his sarcastic but observational material. I love the self-consciousness and self-deprecation of Ellen and Andy Kindler. I'm always a big fan of intelligent people who aren't afraid of looking like fools.
What is the worst job you have ever had?
I worked for three days as a landscaper. It made me wish that I could control soil with my mind. I was barista and hated that, too. I worked pumping gas, which is brutal in the Canadian winter. Although you can get a sweet buzz from the fumes.
What are some of your favorite television shows? Movies?
I love "WKRP," "SNL," "Monty Python." "Cheers." "Arrested Development," "The Larry Sanders Show," "The Colbert Report." Carol Burnett movies. "Bladerunner," "Shaun Of The Dead," "Life of Brian," "Lord of the Rings," "Aliens," "It's A Wonderful Life," "A Christmas Carol" (the black-and-white one with Alistair Sim), "Ghostbusters," and the James Bond movies (especially "On Her Majesty's Secret Service.")
What do you hope to gain by becoming the Last Comic Standing?
I hope to gain the love and respect of all human beings in America and after that, the world. I also want to get free meals at many well-known restaurant chains. Oh, and I wouldn't mind having my own television show on NBC.
Most embarrassing moment? Have you recovered?
I am never embarrassed. If I do something wrong, I start screaming, "I meant to do that!" as loud as I can until people stop looking at me.
Give us your best "knock knock" joke.
Knock knock! Who's there? Sean Cullen. Sean Cullen who? Oh. I must have the wrong house.
What is the worst question you have ever been asked in an interview?
Do you think you could catch a bullet in you ear? I can't.