Liz gets great news: her adoption agency may have found a child for her - a hemophiliac with a sleep disorder named Dracul. Her dream of being a parent may come true soon after all. Tracy congratulates her and then encourages her to be more spontaneous before kids enter her life. Liz protests that she's already spontaneous, but it's clear to her and Tracy that maybe she does need a bit more whimsy in her life.
Liz finds Jack in his office, looking over a bounty of gifts sent as congratulations on his being named NBC CEO. He tells Liz his promotion won't be formal until the board meets at the end of the week. In the meantime he's headed to Florida to wrap up his late mother's estate. His mother was a miserable old crone, Jack tells Liz, but of course he loved her nonetheless. He invites Liz to join him. Sensing an opportunity to be spontaneous, Liz accepts.
With Liz headed to Florida and Pete away at a line producers' convention, it seems no one is in charge. Tracy and Jenna step into the void, signing for deliveries, ordering snacks and getting mildly drunk on power. Martin Lutherking, an NBC lawyer, arrives and explains that TGS has been named in a hostile work environment lawsuit. The plaintiff is Hazel Wassername (AKA Richard Drench) and she's suing the network for 50 million dollars. Citing sexual hostility and abuse, she's named Jenna and Tracy specifically. The lawyer considers the lawsuit frivolous but to defend against it, he'll need everyone on the staff to sign an affidavit that there hasn't been inappropriate behavior in the workplace.
At Colleen's old condo, Liz and Jack meet his mother's former caregiver, Martha. Martha remembers Colleen fondly, reminiscing about her easy smile and quick sense of humor. Jack's incredulous; he wonders if Martha is trying to pull a scam. He distracts Martha and sends Liz in to his mother's bedroom to snoop. Liz is floored by what she finds: photos of Colleen and Martha arm in arm, enjoying vacations together. There's also evidence of sexual escapades - Colleen and Martha were lovers! Jack can't believe it.
Tracy and Jenna get to work on getting the affidavits signed. The only problem child is Kenneth. They assume that because Hazel was his former lover that he's reluctant to conspire against her. But the truth is that Kenneth just doesn't feel right lying: he's seen plenty of things around the office that were wholly inappropriate.
Martha continues to make Jack and Liz feel at home, inviting them to spend the night. She lets them know they'll need to share a bed. That's okay with Liz since she and Jack are just friends and friends should be able to share a bed without a problem. Jack agrees but informs Liz that nothing will happen in the bed tonight - he clarifies that he's referring specifically to her "digestive failings."
Lying side by side, Liz wonders aloud why nothing ever did happen between them; they were certainly both available at the same time and Jack's a notorious womanizer. Liz laments that she just wasn't fun enough to be attractive to him. Jack poo-poos the idea, explaining that the mentor-mentee relationship they've had is what's really special; he wouldn't compromise that by sleeping with her. Liz presses, irritating Jack, who then storms off to sleep in the car.
The next morning, Martha seeks out Jack to give him a favorite photo of his mom. Jack realizes now how much Martha meant to his mom - and expresses his gratitude to her.
Jenna and Tracy start to feel some remorse over their relentless lobbying of Kenneth to lie about his observations and sign the exculpatory affidavit. Making matters worse, Kenneth's simply not acting himself, growing his sideburns, wearing a leather jacket and developing an affection for jazz.
They bring Kenneth to Martin Lutherking and invite him to tell the truth. We watch a series of seemingly endless recalled incidents where Kenneth is humiliated, slapped or both. The lawyer is going to have to take an alternate approach to defending the lawsuit.
Liz calls Jack for help. In an effort to demonstrate her spontaneity, she's tried to sneak in line at the Harry Potter World exhibit at Universal Orlando. Jack bails her out. They muse about Colleen and how she apparently spontaneously decided to become a happy person later in life - in her case by embracing a lesbian lover. Jack wonders if he could ever be happy. Liz tells him he's about to be named CEO of NBC and that he's happier than he's ever been.
Back in her office, Liz takes a call from Bev, the adoption agency caseworker. They've got an immediate placement option – but it's two children who can't be separated. Liz jumps on it: she and Criss are going to be parents to a boy and girl!
Hank Hooper stops by to explain that due to the lawsuit and the den of sin that Liz has created, he's cancelling TGS as his final act as CEO.